One of the basic principles of social psychology is to help us about the understanding of relationships that has long lasting effects for the better survival of human beings. There are particular factors those lead individuals towards long-term relationships, like to maintain and develop similar interests and continue to share their important values and believe. Sometimes, cognition become more important than the emotions and in this form the close relationships are based on companionate love; which means a love having the basic of friendship, mutual attraction, common pect and concern for each other’s welfare.
Closeness and Intimacy: As the relation progress, partners come to know each other, gather with greater degree and feel each other interestingly and become more closer to understand each other better for developing long time relationships, whereas in un-successful relationships, closeness does not exists that leads a couple towards the high probability of break-up. The factor of closeness in relationships is due to the reciprocal self-disclosure: the tendency to communicate frequently without the fear of reprisal and in an accepting empathetic manner. The facters which include social support, collectiveness, caring, acceptance and we-ness lead individuals towards closeness and strong intimacy.
Communal and Exchange Relationships: Communal relationships are close relationships in which partners expand their for equity and exchange, giving support to the partner in order to meet his or her needs and without the consideration of costs to themselves, whereas Exchange relationships; in which each of the partners keeps track of his/her contribution to the partnership. Couples those are having long-term relations are having belief on the equality of sharing responsibility and aware about the needs of each other beyond the rewards themselves and think of a relationship in communal way.
Interdependence and commitment: When couple begins to take care of house hold activities together, the element to co-operation, interdependency and collective responsibility involve to get a bigger and common goals which lead towards long time relationships.
Commitment refers to feelings and actions that keep partners working together to maintain the long-lasting relationship.
What is Love? Love is the important part of many close relationships which has the attributes like, cognition and affected behavior which exists cross-culturally where it experienced in different ways. Robert Stenberg and some other researchers explained the concept of ‘Triangular model of Love’ which suggests, there are three types of love which is bassed on different combinations of cognition and emotion variables in terms of passion, intimacy and commitment. This model suggests that, these three components are exist just in complete romantic relationships. People belongs from collectivistic background tend to less emphasize on romantic love as compare to those people who has the individualistic background.
Individual differences in loving:
Attachment style. Attachment style is defined as, Individual differences that, how people relate to others in close relationships. We use the attribute of attachment when we interact with our love ones. The development of attachment is started from the early growth of children, some children get Secure attachment attribute which lead them to build a strong affiliation with their family and peers but some children has insecure attachment patterns known as the Anxious attachments, where they became overly dependent on the parents and continually seek more affiliation from them. There is another type of insecure attachment known as Avoidant attachment in which children become unable to relate to the parents at all, becoming distant, fearful and cold. Dis-organized attachment style is the blend on these two insecure attachment styles.
Internet Relationships: We can also create the same sense of caring through online interacting as we do while face-to-face interaction, some researches reveal that, those people who spend more time on internet (Facebook, twitter etc) also give more time to their love ones, they build more relationships, socially very active and have good psychological health. Internet relationships can so successful because the patners self-disclose their personal information, having no physical cues to person’s attractiveness and just focus on the important characteristics of each other. Internet also provides the easy facility to keep in touch with other and is a resource to find people of your own choice and mentality and provide an easy way to make friendships.
Making Relationships Last: We can maintain our relationships long lasting through, (1) be prepare for squabbles, (2) think positive, (3) be aware in how you evaluate behaviors, (4) follow your partner actions (5) have fun with your spouse.
By Muhammad Faizan Jamil